San Antonio's 2025 New Year's Resolutions: More River Walks, Less Traffic?
The confetti's settled, the champagne flutes are empty, and the only thing left shimmering is the faint memory of that questionable New Year's Eve margarita. But before we fully embrace the reality of 2024, let's take a hilarious look at the most common (and often hilariously unrealistic) New Year's resolutions swirling around San Antonio.
Forget the generic "lose weight" and "eat healthier" – San Antonians have resolutions as unique as our city's vibrant culture. So grab your favorite breakfast taco and let's dive in!
Top 5 San Antonio New Year's Resolutions:
- Master the Art of the River Walk Shuffle: This isn't about learning a new dance move (though that'd be impressive). It's about navigating the throngs of tourists and locals alike without losing your sanity (or your shoes) on the iconic River Walk. Bonus points if you can snag a table at Boudro's without a three-hour wait.
- Conquer the I-35 Traffic Beast: This one's a classic. Every San Antonian dreams of a commute that doesn't involve a silent scream and the rhythmic tapping of the steering wheel. Maybe this year, the resolution is less about conquering the traffic and more about accepting its chaotic reign over our lives. (We can dream, right?)
- Explore Beyond the Pearl District: We love the Pearl. We really love the Pearl. But San Antonio is a city bursting with hidden gems beyond the trendy breweries and upscale restaurants. This year, the resolution is to venture into the less-explored neighborhoods, discover new taco joints, and unearth the city's secret culinary treasures.
- Learn to Say "No" to Free Chips and Salsa: This is a tough one. San Antonio's generous spirit extends to free chips and salsa, a culinary blessing and a dietary curse. The resolution? Moderate consumption. Or maybe just accept defeat and embrace the deliciousness.
- Attend More Fiesta Events (Without Losing Your Voice): Fiesta is a glorious, chaotic, and incredibly loud celebration. The resolution? To fully immerse ourselves in the festivities without losing our voice before the first parade even begins. This requires strategic hydration and maybe a small, personal megaphone.
The Victor Wembanyama Wildcard Resolution:
- Casually Bump Into Victor Wembanyama at the H-E-B: This one requires a blend of strategic grocery shopping, impeccable timing, and maybe a little bit of luck (and possibly a disguise involving a giant sombrero). The goal? A completely unplanned, yet totally Instagrammable, encounter with the Spurs' rising star. (We're not saying we'll camp out in the produce section, but...)
If you do meet him, make sure to tag us on Instagram
Bonus Resolution: Actually Use That San Antonio CityPASS: We all buy it with good intentions, then it languishes in a drawer until it expires. This year, let's make a pact to actually visit the Alamo, the Tower of the Americas, and all the other amazing attractions included in our CityPASS.
